The ABC’s of Pleasing Your Spouse

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For the last few weeks I have posted about my accountability and how it has benefited my marriage. (Accountability, Guest Perspective, Husband Perspective, Questions)

We listed off 8 questions that we ask each other weekly, and here is a quick way to remember all the questions:  Ask yourself if you are doing your ABC’s.

A: After work: How did you greet your husband?
B: Be together: What non-sexual connections did you have this week?
C: Communication: How well did you interact with your spouse verbally and non-verbally?
D: Deeper Connection with God: Did you spend time in the Word and praying this week?
E: Encounters (my code word for intimacy in the bedroom): Were you an active participant? What did you do to make it special or exciting?
F: Five Love Languages, or in our case, ‘Fysical Touch’ [I know it is spelled wrong, but work with me 😉 ]  How well did you meet your husband’s primary love language?   Accountability is great, but you can’t stop there.  Accountability shows you that you need to come up with creative ideas and then work hard to change.  This week I am going to give you some ideas on how to improve some of the areas covered by my accountability questions. One thing I have loved about having an accountability friend is hearing someone else’s ideas. Sometime we get in a rut and our ideas run out, but hearing what someone else does can spark a new interest and excitement. Here are some ideas we have come up with.

Printable:  | PDF_Picture  Accountability Questions with Great Ideas!  

Ideas for Fun and Relaxing Time with our spouse: (Question #4)

  • Play a card game
  • Watch a show together while snuggling on the couch
  • Give each other a 10 minute back or foot rub
  • Discuss a book chapter together
  • Enjoy a candlelight dinner or dessert together after the kids go to bed.
  • Take a shower together
  • Exercise Together
  • Pick a room/area and organize/clean it together
  • Pick one of your projects that have been on your list forever and work on it together.
  • Dream together
  • Make goals together for your…marriage, ministry, parenting, house, vacations,
  • Go on a walk or bike ride
  • Go to a show or movie
  • Serve at a soup kitchen together
  • Go putt-putt golfing or play tennis
  • Watch your husband play a sports game, or join him in the game
  • Garden together
  • Cook a meal together
  • Plan a vacation
  • Do a puzzle
  • Rake leaves together
  • Listen to music together
  • Dance in your living room

Ways to connect with Non-sexual touch: (Question #6)

  • Play footsy under the table
  • Brush your hand across his back while walking past.
  • Rub the side of his knee
  • Kiss in the car at stoplights
  • Hold hands in the car
  • Back rub
  • Foot/leg rub
  • Take a shower together
  • Tickle fight
  • Long hug, make sure you lean in
  • Scoot closer to him when you are sitting next to each other

Intimacy activities (Question #3)

  • Wear a fun outfit
  • Play a Dating Diva Game (Feb 20th blog post)
  • Take a bath or shower together
  • Play a version of strip poker (you can also make a list of questions to ask each other and if the person gets the question wrong, they lose an article of clothing)
  • Take turns giving each other a full body massage.
  • Other resources:

No Ruts Allowed!

The point of all these lists is to remind you to be creative. When you do the same thing over and over you get in a rut. Then serving your spouse become an item on your to-do list instead the desire of your heart like it used to be. Never forget – your husband is first in line on your priority list!

Are you ready to make the commitment to refresh and renew your relationship?  Make it your goal to do something new this week.  It will be the first step on a long, fun journey.

We want to hear from you!