As I am typing this post, I am lying on the floor outside my children’s rooms. My youngest refuses to stop talking and/or crying and is keeping the girls awake. As I lie here I am reminded how many times a day we have to walk in patience and kindness towards our kids.
And some days it doesn’t even end at bedtime.
I have hit it pretty hard the last few weeks as we talk about patience and kindness. I have put some big challenges out there for myself and for you. There are so many things that we have to juggle, so many things that keep us on our toes, but sweet mom, you are so able to do all of this! Deep down you love your children with all of your heart. You would give anything you could to them, you would die for them. Please don’t let condemnation or guilt paralyze you. Remember you have all that you need to be the mommy to the children whom God has entrusted to your care!In Romans 12:18 (NIV) we read, “If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone.”
Someone pointed out a key word to me in this verse a long time ago. Here, read it again, “If it is possible, as far as it depends on YOU, live at peace with everyone.” The main word in this passage is YOU, not EVERYONE. I have fabulous news!!! We can walk in patience and kindness because it all depends on you (or me as I am writing this to myself). It is not dependent on how your children behave or how your family member talked to you on the phone. It isn’t even dependent on if your friend helped you or not. It is a decision that you have complete control over. For once, something you can control 😉
With God’s help, all of this that I am calling us to do is possible. We can change. We can love our children with an unconditional love that is full of patience and kindness.
One weekend a few months ago, I was asking my husband for help. I was explaining to him all the mental battles I face in the day and how by the end of some days I just don’t have much fight left in me. Unfortunately, he sometimes sees me at my worst, and this time I was willing to listen to any suggestions he might have. Well, that night he didn’t have any great pearls of wisdom, but a few days later he did. This is how it happened:
I went out for a couple of hours and Nate had the 4 kids to himself for one and half hours before he was to put them to bed. When I got home he reminded me about my dilemma and the question that I had asked him: “Why can’t I just be happy and joyful instead of frustrated and angry?” My time away had given him time to consider my question, and this is what he told me: “I think the better question is actually, ‘Why wouldn’t you be angry?'” Then he proceeded to inform me of all that the kids had done in the 90 minutes I was gone.
- Jake threw all the silverware from the dishwasher into the trash.
- Luke spilled all of his blue Fun Dip all over himself and the floor.
- Jake dumped the salt shaker.
- The kids destroyed the packaging that our new TV came in and Styrofoam pellets were all over the main floor.
- Bekah hit Luke with a broom accidentally.
- Jake hit Luke with a broom on purpose.
- Bekah sucked up Luke’s shirt with the vacuum…while he was still wearing the shirt.
- And the kids argued with each other the whole time.
Again Nate said, “With all the things that happen in a day, why wouldn’t you be mad????”
So dear friend, I understand your dilemma. I know how hard it is on some days to keep your cool. Trust me when I say that each time you do choose to act kindly you are making a difference! You are planting seeds of love into their hearts. You are showing them glimpses of our heavenly Father’s unconditional love. Even on the days when you blow it, asking them for forgiveness can show them that they don’t have to be perfect, they just have to be humble and God will bless that.
So this week when you are struggling to keep your cool, know there is another mama out there fighting the same battle. We are fighting it together! We are in the process of winning our children’s souls to the Lord, and we will stand victorious!
Keep fighting the good fight, it will be worth it!
This week’s assignment is simple: Wake up each morning and say this prayer.
Printable Version: | C13 Mom’s Daily Prayer |
“Lord, today I choose to be more like you. I choose to walk in kindness and patience towards my husband and my kids. Lord, I know that I cannot do this alone. I need you every step of the way. Let me see them through your eyes. Give me the words to say to minister to their hearts. Give me the strength to pause, ask you for help and follow your spirit’s leading. Thank-you that I am not alone. In your name I pray, Amen.”